Thank God that God is in control.

I am freaking out! The end of this semester seems to have come out of nowhere, and I have to much to get done!

I just cannot let myself forget that God is in control.
I feel like saying that out loud helps me to remember. :)

God is looking out for me!
I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength!

These papers will NOT be the end of me.
Next week this time it will all be over!

God is in control. God is in control. God is in control.
And, thank God that He is in control, because I couldn't do it without Him!

Apology

My life is not my own...

I have been living it like it is lately.

And, for that, I am sincerely sorry.

This semester I developed a new attitude.

I began constantly thinking,

"what about what I want?"

...in every situation.

For some of you, this makes no sense at all.

Why should I apologize for putting myself first?

Because...

IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!

It just isn't. Life is so much bigger than me.

I have been called to live a life, serving God first, others second, and myself last.

I used to pride myself for doing so, 

and I am sorry that I haven't lately.

And, for those of you who think this is crazy...

From personal experience,

 I am much happier when I live my life for God and for others

than when I do for myself.

Now, to spare confusion...

This does not mean that I don't ever need to think about what I want.

It just means that I don't need to make myself center of the universe.

So, to my friends and family...

I am sorry for my selfishness.

I know that it is not something I can just turn off,

but I am working hard to fix my attitude.

Please pray for me to stay focused on God and the calling that He has for my life!

I love you all. <3

Michelle.

"We're the ones,

Gonna put it all in reverse,

Gonna die to ourselves,

Gonna live to serve,

Cause you get what you get when you walk by faith,

 Is it really so dumb to throw it all away?

They say it sounds insane,

We say that we've been changed,

By the power of...

CRAZY LOVE!

This world it looks at us, like we're ridiculous,

Baby, it's all because,

CRAZY LOVE!"

Pointless???

In the midst of writing a 5 page paper, I am beginning to wonder more and more.
What's the point?
Does any of this really matter? And will I use any of this information in the coming years?

Perhaps this is a poor attitude to have.
But, this just feels like punishment. Honestly.

I suppose I am expanding my knowledge and getting out of my tiny bubble of information that I keep stored in my brain.

Then again, I really am not sure how much more information my tiny brain can contain before it explodes.

Now, I must stop complaining, and write this paper. Because, well, I need an A.
Because I will not be satisfied otherwise.
Oh life. :)

In other news, my birthday is in a day :). And that is exciting!

A year's difference.

Just a year ago my facebook status read:

 "Dear God, make me a bird, so I can fly far, far, far away from here.

Dear God, make me a bird, so I can fly far, far far away from here.

Dear God, make me a bird, so I can fly far, far away from here."

In a sense, that seems like just yesterday. But yet again, a lifetime ago.

The moment I wrote that, I was feeling:

Trapped. Betrayed. Scared. Alone. Hurt. Confused.

Little did I realize, God had given me wings to fly away a long time before I even wanted to.

The wings God gave me consisted of:

Faith. Hope. Courage. Strength. Wisdom.

It was up to me to use my "wings" and take myself to where I needed to be.

And after I used them I gained:
Relief. Peace. Joy. 

Don't wait for your circumstances to change. Take action to change them yourself.

Don't sit around forever wishing you were somewhere else in life.

Go there!

Seek what plans God has in store for you.

They are far better than what you could ever imagine.

Just realize, God isn't always going to stick you right where he wants you.

God opens doors, it is our job to walk through them!

Or, in my case... God made wings and it was my job to flap them. ;)

Friday Confessional 3

I confess that at this moment in my life I weigh more than I ever have before.

My tummy is still flat, but let's just say I am becoming a bit more "curvaceous" than what I am used to.

Which, is lovely. 

However, the dilemma is staying at this weight and not gaining ANY more pounds.

Speaking of weight, I confess that I cannot stand when people wear clothes that are too small for them. 

There are flattering clothes for every body type, find them.

If God made you a size large, stop trying to fit into an extra small.

It's disgusting.

I confess that I am a nerd. 

I look forward to my Constitutional Law class every Tues./Thurs.

And, as mentioned in my roommate's blog, my roommate and I find attempting to name all 50 states and their capitals entertaining.

I confess that I have stared at the screen for ten minutes debating on whether or not to end this post by confessing a certain thing.

Maybe next week ;)

Isn't a little bit ironic?

The irony that life creates never ceases to amaze me.

Hooray for short, meaningless posts.
Perhaps I should do them more often.

Flashbacks.

It is unbelievable how a song can take you back to a certain moment in time.

Half of the time I find myself cranking up the volume, while the other half I immediately change the song.
Some moments I wish I could relive, while others... I'd rather not remember.